Developing a “Core Self” 

Since 1990, I have been providing counseling services for individuals, families, and couples.  With humor, common sense, and focus on unexpressed resources, we together find a better way of being in the world.  Counseling is a process of discovering  hidden resources and Self-leadership.  This Self is at everyone’s core and is one of compassion, creativity, calm, clarity, courage, and connection.  Our way of protecting our Self often covers-up this core Self and creates repetitive, less fulfilling patterns from our family orgian, relationships, and careers, thus, living a smaller life than we were born to live.  

It is my belief that we were all born with a purpose and the world needs us to find our significant place in it.  In order to find this place of purpose, we first have to develop skills of adulthood.  These skills include conflict resolution, emotional regulation, survival, cooperation, a socially viable personality, and ability to trust and listen one’s  “Core Self”.  

Strong healthy relationships stem from a mature Self that can be developed both individually and through significant relationships. The developing Self first learns ways of belonging to a family, peer group, social and/or religious organizations.  The mature Self begins to choose integrity and authenticity over conformity.  This is frequently seen in young adults as they discovery who they are apart from friends and family.

There are many ways to support this developing Self. One is through group experiences that support this type of Self development.  Some of the many varieties of group experiences include volunteering, self-help groups, churches, psychotherapy groups, mediation groups, study abroad,  and certain colleges and graduate schools.  Individual growth can be supported by journaling, meditation, nature experiences, travel, hobbies,  self designed journeys, and improved family relationships.  

The other way to support the development of our core Self is through psychotherapy. The process of psychotherapy I use is influenced by the Internal Family Systems Model, Somatic Experiencing, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Family Systems Theories such as Bowen Family Therapy, Structural Family Therapy, and Emotional Focused Therapy.  Together we set intentions for therapy and develop therapeutic interactions to support reaching your goals.  This is a collaborative and empowering process.

© Chris Burris 2015